The word I was looking for verses about today is Doubt. Again – I think a close relative of Fear and Anxiety. Combine the three and you can have a perfect storm. I cannot even imagine having all of those and not knowing Jesus. This week ~ I am sure thankful for his grace.
I found several verses that spoke to me but one in particular pretty much describes how I have recently felt. James 1:6-8 says “But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by this wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.”
Being totally transparent with this day 3 of sharing my devotional time, I have felt a little unstable recently in many things. A little tossed in the wind. I know, without a doubt, the plan God has revealed for my life, however getting there is another story lately. Decisions that normally should be easy to make(like the color of a wall!!), projects that I should be able to zip through, distractions that I should be able to recognize, thoughts that I should be discarding as the enemy….all these things have paralyzed me at times. When talking to a trusted person this week she said something very simple which can almost be considered a mathematical equation, because that is the way my analytical brain thinks. She brought to my attention that I was letting myself be controlled by fear, anxiety and doubt. She asked me where those things come from. I said very definitely Satan. Well unfortunately, in this equation, if you are being controlled by fear, anxiety and doubt and those things come from Satan, then you are allowing yourself to be controlled by Satan. Ouch. While it was true and something that deep down I knew and have heard time and time again(even last week by another really smart person!), I did not like hearing it in that moment in that way. The reality of what I was allowing in my life despite my faith. I am the daughter of the most high King. Nothing else has power over me. Unless I let it.
Her challenge was for me to look up some verses on each of those words and put them on my desk so that in that moment of those thoughts coming into my mind, I had easy access to my weapon to fight them. So that is what I have done for the last three mornings. I now have a stack of colorful cards on my desk that I can flip through in those moments where I don’t feel capable, worthy, good enough, overwhelmed or whatever other random feeling I have that is not coming from God.
On the way home from my time with her I heard a song. One that I am pretty sure I had heard before, but it took on a new meaning for me that day. Almost a theme song for me in this season. You see all of these things (anxiety, fear and doubt) are giants that I have let creep into my life. That I have let distract me. Sometimes derail me ~ destroying my confidence in things. This song gave me words to sing out to Jesus that speak of the faith, hope and heart that I need to face my giants with confidence. It is amazing the peace that song gave me in those moments after hearing out loud again what I was allowing in my life. This is not a new message that has been given to me. Just one it took a little longer to sink in and snap out of. I have snapped out of it. I am sure that there will be things that happen and thoughts that try to creep in but I am going to pull out my weapons.
Here is a link to the song that I heard that will be one of my weapons. I pray that if you are facing giants in your life, it can be your theme song to have the faith, hope and heart to face your giants with confidence. https://youtu.be/KA9kSBv1QrI
Below are Day 1 & Day 2 of this journey for me that I had posted on Facebook.
Day 1 – I opened my bible to look up some verses about a subject I need reminding about ~ fear. We all have fear in some way. Fear of the unknown. Fear of being hurt. Fear of not fulfilling a dream. Fear of failure. Fear.
One that stuck out to me this morning was this. Matthew 6:34 says “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
We are not promised tomorrow on this earth. We are shown that every day with something. Accidents. Illnesses. Violence. Some hit closer to home than others. Some are just reminders. Some are temporary. Some are permanent.
Don’t leave that dream unfinished. Don’t leave those words unsaid. Don’t leave that hug not felt. Don’t leave that apology never given. Find your hope in Jesus and not of the things of this world. They can be changed or stripped away in an instant. Look at those daily reminders as fuel to live every day like it is your last impacting the world like we are called to do and loving like Jesus did.
Day 2 – Since I had so many people say they needed to hear that little message I wrote yesterday, I decided to continue it with the word that I was looking up today. Anxiety. It is the close relative of Fear. Fear can cause Anxiety and Anxiety can cause Fear. It is real and there are often real symptoms. It can result in mental and physical illnesses.
Before I even opened my bible, I knew the first verse that I would look up and put on my little cards I am writing out to put on my desk as reminders. One of my favorites ~ even though honestly sometimes I forget to use it.
Philippians 4:6-7 says “Do not be anxious about ANYTHING, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
I vividly remember a very very smart man (Jamie Hogue ~ your sweet hubby Andy) quoting this scripture to me and him saying, the bible has some absolutes. Emphatic words that are used to make very distinct points. In this case ANYTHING is the word that he highlighted for me. It says do not be anxious about ANYTHING. Nothing. It does not say “well except you should worry about your job, your kids, your illness, your friends…just don’t worry about the big stuff.” No. It say ANYTHING.
I know that it is so hard with the pressures around us to practice that. We live in a world of worry, comparison, illness, sadness and just pure stress. BUT ~ if you follow that next part ~ PRESENT it to God and he will give you PEACE. It might not be an answer right away that you understand or a fix to your problem, but with that peace you can weather any storm and I can assure you when you learn to trust that he is in control and give it to him ~ he will carry you!!
Btw…if you struggle with this…it does not mean that you have less Jesus in you. It just means you need a reminder sometimes and that you need to put some work into changing that thought process. It starts by turning to him and giving it to him. The ultimate provider. Nothing else will work. Not the social media, clothes, pills, alcohol, work, exercise or whatever else people try to fill their lives with to self medicate that anxiety. Nothing else will last.
Tomorrow I will wrap this up with the last word I was tasked to look up and a song that I will share that is my new theme song. For today ~ be blessed and cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you!!! (1 Peter 5:7) Write those scriptures on a sticky note, note card or scrap piece of paper and stick them in front of you as a reminder all day!!
The Call 